All I want for Christmas is Rogue One

By Dan Dunkle | Dec 06, 2016

And a bunch of other stuff, just in case Christine is reading this.

Last month the biggest note on my dry-erase wall calendar was the election. This month it's "Rogue One" coming out on Dec. 16.

Its title is listed officially as "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story." So it is participating in the long tradition of Star Wars movies with silly names. The obvious title should be "Star Wars Rogue One," but I'm sure some Disney suit with a computer full of focus group results and memos on the official canon could give me a lengthy argument.

This isn't the first time the franchise has fallen down on the title. "The Force Awakens," for example. Followed by, "The Force is Kind of Grumpy before its First Cup of Coffee," and "The Force Slowly Settles Into It's Day."

I plan to go opening night if at all possible and hope to see locals enjoying themselves. Maybe a few people will wear costumes like last year, though I don't expect it to be quite as big as last year. People know me as a Star Wars fan and often ask if I will wear a costume. There's always kind of a wink in the question. "Do you just like the movies or are you completely crazy?"

I don't wear costumes to the movies, though I do on Halloween. You may have seen me around town dressed as Sloth from The Goonies this year, handing out Baby Ruths. But I don't see anything wrong with people having fun with it, especially young people. Is it really all that different from getting dressed in your favorite athlete's jersey or painting team logos on yourself or refusing to shave for a month for the Red Sox?

Star Wars fans are like many fans. If you poke around on the web you find the fans that are mad at George Lucas about changes he made to the original series, and you find fans who love the prequels, fans who hate them, fans who love the novels and comic books and think this or that should have been done with the last movie. They all go to every film in the series, but then pick it apart and complain about it.

I'm just as bad in some respects. I would like to be able to buy discs of the original movies exactly as they were when they first came out, without all the additions and weird stuff Lucas did.

But I'm not complaining now that he sold the franchise to Disney. Now, finally, someone has control of the franchise who wants to cash in and make a Star Wars movie every year! Why not? Why make a dozen Spiderman movies and not just as many Star Wars films?

I know eventually they will make a dud and stretch themselves too thin and have to regroup. That happens.

But I'm optimistic that it will be good for a while. Rogue One looks to me like a WWII movie set in the Star Wars galaxy. A rag tag group of misfits pulls off a mission against a much stronger force behind enemy lines! Like a scifi "Where Eagles Dare," or "Guns of Navarone."

Burning questions:

- Why do they always land the walkers far away and then slowly march up to the base they are attacking? Why not land right on top of the base and eliminate the time for the enemy to organize a counter-offensive?

- Would armored walkers work? If so, why aren't we building them down in Bath?

- Why have a ground war at all? Just nuke the whole area.

- Why don't the Rebels use the stolen plans to build their own Death Star?

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